The world really seems unfair often,doesn't it?We often perform the right task,the right way using all the right intentions but alas the result disappoints!And then the feeling that the world really is unfair to us,seems inevitable.I myself in day to day life, face some sort of a deficit.I call it “the trust deficit”.Whatever I do,wherever I am,whenever it is,nobody seems to trust me.
Be it my parents,who have been suffering a lot due to this lack of trust in me,or my friends,even strangers,things get real tough for me often.The issue is me planning of career,the lack of it!I don't have a grand 'practical' career plan as yet,and look to approach life step by step.So unfortunately,due to a lack of belief in me the people around me are suffering on account of my inability to explain it to them.
I never indulge in talking about my life a lot.This is the way I've developed and this is the way I shall be in future.Now,even though people perceive me as someone else,maybe a kind of loser,there is an inner immune system working which protects me from harsh words.Honestly,I have no reason to deny that I'm a social failure and the society is not really my ball game. I never developed the social skills,and probably never will,just because my lack of interest in it.
So while guys are getting bothered about people expecting a lot from them,I'm here sitting and wondering nobody expects anything from me!Well,it definitely has a lot of positives as well:
I can choose and plan my future,freely with almost nothing to chain me.No family complications,no peer pressure,no social pressure,just enough freedom to pursue my course.
The second thing is that,I'm in future planning to live in solitude,with little or no social contact.So although,this cutting off maybe bothering me sometimes,it will benefit me in the long run.
The worldly oriented people and their ideas won't bind me.Even though I have no hesitation to contact a lot of persons,but the nature of that contact is nothing more than that what we do with our fellow passengers on the train.Talk a lot,get friendly but no attachment in the long run.Now the people immersed in relationships,will never understand why it is joyful for me to have no one to share my thoughts with!
There is a lifetime ahead of me to play around and hopefully give something substantial to the world and I don't think there is a problem in it. I have a lot of belief in me,even when others don't and there is enough fuel called motivation to make me last a lifetime with no guilt about my choices.
Although,there may be instances when I get down,and want to leave it all and run off,but still there is enough confidence inside me and with mindfulness being practised even when I'm down and out,I don't think there is a possibility of any stupid decisions on my part.I never hide my weakness,and inability to convey my ideas to other persons is one of them.I have a language barrier,its not that I can't speak the languages.Rather,it is my inability to convert my thoughts into ideas which is the problem.Often,I think something and speak something else.I'm working on it at the moment.
Reading life stories of others often is good pastime and motivation source for me.I often come across fighters form various walks of life,who take their problems to be challenges and succeed.They keep me going and make me realise how little I am.Here they are,fighting everything the world throws at them and look at me.just getting down over someone saying harsh words!
Be it my parents,who have been suffering a lot due to this lack of trust in me,or my friends,even strangers,things get real tough for me often.The issue is me planning of career,the lack of it!I don't have a grand 'practical' career plan as yet,and look to approach life step by step.So unfortunately,due to a lack of belief in me the people around me are suffering on account of my inability to explain it to them.
I never indulge in talking about my life a lot.This is the way I've developed and this is the way I shall be in future.Now,even though people perceive me as someone else,maybe a kind of loser,there is an inner immune system working which protects me from harsh words.Honestly,I have no reason to deny that I'm a social failure and the society is not really my ball game. I never developed the social skills,and probably never will,just because my lack of interest in it.
So while guys are getting bothered about people expecting a lot from them,I'm here sitting and wondering nobody expects anything from me!Well,it definitely has a lot of positives as well:
I can choose and plan my future,freely with almost nothing to chain me.No family complications,no peer pressure,no social pressure,just enough freedom to pursue my course.
The second thing is that,I'm in future planning to live in solitude,with little or no social contact.So although,this cutting off maybe bothering me sometimes,it will benefit me in the long run.
The worldly oriented people and their ideas won't bind me.Even though I have no hesitation to contact a lot of persons,but the nature of that contact is nothing more than that what we do with our fellow passengers on the train.Talk a lot,get friendly but no attachment in the long run.Now the people immersed in relationships,will never understand why it is joyful for me to have no one to share my thoughts with!
There is a lifetime ahead of me to play around and hopefully give something substantial to the world and I don't think there is a problem in it. I have a lot of belief in me,even when others don't and there is enough fuel called motivation to make me last a lifetime with no guilt about my choices.
Although,there may be instances when I get down,and want to leave it all and run off,but still there is enough confidence inside me and with mindfulness being practised even when I'm down and out,I don't think there is a possibility of any stupid decisions on my part.I never hide my weakness,and inability to convey my ideas to other persons is one of them.I have a language barrier,its not that I can't speak the languages.Rather,it is my inability to convert my thoughts into ideas which is the problem.Often,I think something and speak something else.I'm working on it at the moment.
Reading life stories of others often is good pastime and motivation source for me.I often come across fighters form various walks of life,who take their problems to be challenges and succeed.They keep me going and make me realise how little I am.Here they are,fighting everything the world throws at them and look at me.just getting down over someone saying harsh words!
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