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JUST MOVING ON-20


Irrespective of the circumstances does it seem acceptable that the thought of a particular woman destabilizes an otherwise sane man?I won't accept it but sadly the person in mention here is me itself.The thought of this woman has haunted me for the past few months and I've not been to get over it.A lot of times my mood just gets upset or some of my important work gets ruined and I feel helpless over it.Right now I was thinking about her and now I feel like I should not be doing this.How to get over it?Well,as far as my limited knowledge is concerned,lust is powerful and even the mightiest of men can be grasped by it.How to overcome this power of lust and get a peaceful and proper life is something I am working on but till date I've tasted only failure.

Yeah a lot of people say what's in a woman!I too think so but the thought of the woman stirs up emotions which eventually get out of the hand and I end up doing something totally unexpected.The mind suddenly gets away from my grip to the fantasy world and then I struggle hard to bring it back to reality.I've passed my teenage years without causing any embarrassment to the people around me although like all others I had to struggle a lot in coping with life.But the things seem to have been cooled down to a level that I can take responsibility for my actions.These days the firm grip I claim to have over myself is suddenly loosening.I don't know how t control it but then as always i have a few ideas which I hope help me regain control of the mind:

Whenever the thought of this woman comes,just think she is out of my region of influence and that i don't have the will as well as right to pursue her.Going this way my mind will cease to venture into the fantasy land.

In fact the problem is the lust hidden inside me relating to this woman in particular.I've recognized it and devise some effective measures to counter lust although I have no control over lust at present.

Now that I've asserted that the girl is out of the bounds for me,I need to realize the truth of this statement.

Now coming to my social life,as the coming months are going to be my last ones in this college it is totally up to me whether chill and enjoy in the company of friends or get driven by lust.The control over thought is necessary and I feel it is missing.if I look at the last few months there has been some positive and some negative behavior,as always:

positive ones:

I developed the habit of waking up early in the morning which has now improved my sleeping time as well as overall health.

I applied mind control over my daily life.

I was attentive in the classes at college and did not bunk any.

I did not have any kind of dispute with anyone.

The negative ones;

I had careless attitude which sometimes went overboard.

I wasted a lot of time just sitting and doing nothing which need to be curtailed.

I lost control over myself and misbehaved with people.

I sometimes tried to impose myself over others,the ego problem!

I wanted to pen it down keeping my lust in focus and I hope it extinguishes soon.What I aim to do?Well the day i'll not be excited in the presence of this woman and behave normally as interacting with others,I'll say that indeed I'm in control of my mind and I've succeeded in applying theory to practice.
Location: New Delhi, Delhi, India

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